Sometimes I think I’m better off alone. I understand that once you’ve been in a relationship for a while and you’ve gotten over the “honeymoon” stage, things settle down. And when you start getting comfortable, the butterfly feelings disappear. And mine have began to a lot. I doubt more than I’m secure. Why is that? That’s frikken messed up. I used to think it was because of me and my insecurities, but hell no. It’s this relationship. We both take each other for granted and forget about each other. Most of the time it’s because of ignorance on my end. I don’t know what’s up with his end. But for me, I don’t WANT to text or call because our conversations have become meaningless and the lovey dovey isn’t there. We call to see where each other is at. That’s pretty much it. This isn’t love at all. It’s tolerance. I thought giving sacrificial love would help, but it seems that just gets taken advantage of over and over again. And why is it that he enjoys himself so much more when he’s not with me? That’s a slap to my face forreal. So maybe I’m just better off alone. Smh. I’ll stick to my boy bands. Dreams seem to be better than my reality right now. Sure they don’t know I exist. But no matter what….they can never hurt me because of the simple fact that they don’t know me. At least I can confide in that.